Ask the Angels
by RainbowKittenSurprise
Summary: Damon and Elena have traveled to New York after she turned off her humanity switch. Damon thinks that he's in control and keeping Elena in check while she discovers the pleasures of being a vampire without her humanity. But Elena has other plans for Damon and his own humanity switch. Canon until 4X17.
1. Chapter 1 I love New York

"What if one day when this is all over you want to come home again?" Stefan asked. It was a stretch, he knew, but at this point it was all he had.

"I won't." The match fell to the floor, and all Elena felt was the memory of emotion.

When vampires described turning their humanity switch on, Elena thought it would be most difficult to do right after it was turned off, but it wasn't. She could still remember how she felt before and it echoed inside her like a wave. She was too close to the rock that put everything in motion and she could feel how easy it would be to take it all back and turn her humanity back on. She had to leave.

The three of them left the house, but she didn't bother looking back. Elena knew if she did that the memories would be there waiting. She could think of a dozen ways to save the house if she tried, and then what was the point of everything?

"Damon. Take me somewhere." Her voice was flat. She supposed emotion was tied with intonation.

Damon raised an eyebrow at her before looking at the house and then at Stefan who nodded. They probably thought that Damon would still be able to help her in some way. Him and Stefan thought the sire bond would hold even through this, but she knew it was already severed. Before, her body sang whenever it was near Damon. The desire to please him took over her every thought, but now, nothing. He was just an opportunity to get away.

She climbed into the car with Damon, choosing to focus on some street sign in front of her instead of the house. She needed to get away faster.

"Where to, kitten?" He smirked. If there was ever a time she less kitten-y it was now.

Her face gave nothing away. "Just drive."

* * *

Stefan watched the car drive away and fought his instinct to get in a car and follow. He knew that Elena was lost to him, but he couldn't make his body stop trying to protect her. Whatever closeness Elena felt for Damon, whatever the reason was for her turning to Damon instead of him was because of the sire bond. He knew that Elena would never choose his brother over him, but the rejection still took the breath out of him. How was he supposed to trust Damon to help her?

Dimly, he heard Caroline in the house trying to put out the fire, but she needed help. The gasoline was making this a losing battle, but he knew that the house was her emotional trigger. They needed to salvage it in order to bring Elena back. When Damon and Elena were finally far enough away that he couldn't sense them anymore, he rushed to the house in order to help Caroline.

He didn't know what they would do if the house didn't survive.

* * *

"Damon, do you remember the Murder House that we went to when you taught me how to feed?" Elena looked over at him from the passenger side of the car. She had offered to drive, but he was crazy about people driving his car.

"Do I even need to justify that question with an answer?" He looked over at her with a smile on his face as he remembered that night. Damon's eyes lingered over her throat as he imagined all the blood that had left a trail to her breasts. His gums started to ache and he figured the road was probably where his eyes should be about now.

"You couldn't keep your hands off me."

Elena shifted in her seat so that she could look at him better. She had been trying to figure out the best way to get him…hazy for the past few hours. The most fun she could think of was a Damon who was a lot more distracted with a lot less brain power. She didn't think being direct would work; he would see it for what it was a mile away or chalk her actions up to her humanity switch. No, before she tried anything she needed him good and buzzed.

"You're a much better dancer than Stefan."

He scoffed. "That's hardly a compliment considering you're comparing me to Stefan. He's had a whole tree up his ass for decades."

Elena moved a little closer so that she had to prop herself up on the middle consol. The space was small, which meant that her scent was already permeating the car, but she wanted to overwhelm him.

"Okay, maybe not. But I could use some more fun like that night." She watched as his hands tightened on the steering wheel. Oh yeah, she was definitely getting to him. "How much longer do we have to drive?"

"That depends." Damon knew she was up to something, but he couldn't figure out the end game. This car ride was going to actually kill him. He wanted to put some space between him and Elena, but there wasn't exactly a lot of room. Damon chose to speed up. He could at least try to get them somewhere quicker so they could finally get out of the car. _And do what?_

"On?" She shifted again so that her arm was draped over the back of his seat. Her fingers twisted the hair at the nape of his neck, being careful not to actually touch his neck. Not touching him was hard, but she bet he was harder.

Damon was screwed. He needed to adjust his pants but there was no way to do it without Elena noticing. As if she hadn't already noticed his pants getting tighter. Any longer and circulation was going to be a main concern.

"On how long it takes you to stop distracting me." He saw a sign for a gas station and actually said a silent prayer. Not that he actually believed in God, but still, what's a little mental chatter with a non-existent deity? "And on how long it takes me to get gas."

Elena leaned back against her seat and pouted. Damon-1. Elena-0. He pulled into the gas station as quickly as he could before realizing the gas tank was on the other side. Okay, maybe it was more like Damon-0. Elena-1. Nah, no way they were totally tied.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom. Try not to kill anyone while I'm gone, okay kitten?"

It took whatever remaining restraint he had not to run too fast into the bathroom. Once inside, he propped himself against the sink to try to steady himself. Everything ached. His gums, his jaw, his… everything. And he was starving. He thought again about the night at the murder house when Elena ran her finger along his neck to pick up some extra blood before licking her finger clean.

"Dammit!" He cracked the sink before he finally took a step back. It was going to be a long three hours to New York.

* * *

"Look, all that matters is, when I lived here I fed like crazy and had a blast. And went undetected for years."

He wasn't sure what Elena was going to be like without her humanity switch. So far, she hadn't been put into enough situations to test the waters. It wasn't exactly like she had enough of a bad side when she was human to make predictions. The only way to find out was going to be to throw her into the metaphorical waters and let her sink or swim.

"So we're just here to have fun? What's the catch?" Elena stopped in front of him, making him look in her eyes. Maybe Damon was playing with her too.

"There's no catch. Look, you wanted out; I got you out. You wanted to feed; I brought you to a city sized all-you-can-eat buffet. That's the beauty of New York. There's so much life that a little death goes unnoticed." He shrugged his shoulders and decided now was as good a time as ever. "Come on, let's get some lunch."

At first all they did was walk aimlessly around the city. Elena had never seen anything so big. As a human she had always wanted to come to New York, see some musicals, eat some pizza, do all of the touristy stuff. But now all she could focus on was letting loose and finally enjoying what it meant to be a vampire.

Occasionally, Damon would point out a road or store where he killed someone or talk about a place that used to exist but didn't anymore. Overall, he seemed to be riding the nostalgia train.

Elena was getting bored. What she wanted was to a party, a place where she could finally indulge in all of the vampire urges that Stefan and Caroline had been forcing her to suppress. She wanted to fill herself to the bring with blood until she felt bloated, get Damon to drain her and get all fuzzy. And then, she wanted him to turn his humanity off. And none of that was going to happen with him walking around with some nostalgic moron.

"Why did you bring me here? We could have gone anywhere." Elena was getting tired of wandering and now she was starving.

"My history in this city has a particular resonance with your current situation. When I had my humanity off."

"What happened to make you turn your humanity switch off?" This was good. If the last time he had been here he'd had him humanity turned off, it might make it easier for Elena to get him to flip it again.

"Leave it to Beaver. The '50s bored me." He gave her one of his casual smirks that tried too hard. He was hiding something.

"Avoidance. That's a new tactic I've never seen from you before." Elena looked around her to see if there was anyone to feed on, and Damon was right. There were so many people it was more a question of _who_ not if. "Whatever. I'm bored now."

Suddenly, Damon was behind her with his hands on his shoulders. She stilled instantly, waiting to see just where his hands were going to go. For starters, lower would be better.

"Take your pick, Elena. You can have anyone you want." His breath was warm in her ear and made her emotions blend together. She was hungry all right. But now she didn't know what she wanted more. Blood or sex. She leaned back into him and rested her head on his shoulder.

"And if I want you?" Elena grabbed Damon's hands and moved them to settle on her hips. Or tried to at least. Before they got there he moved back in front of her.

He _tsked_. "Nuh-uh-uh. You've got to take me out to dinner first."

"Fine. I'll take her." Elena jumped in front of the closest girl next to them and grabbed her shoulders. Before Damon could get out a syllable Elena bit the girl's neck and threw her at Damon not caring who was watching. She had to give it to Damon, his mouth only hung open in shock for a second before he moved the girl into the nearest ally. Elena followed while slowly licking the remaining blood off her lips.

"What the hell, Elena?" Damon's eyes were furious, but he didn't seem able to keep from looking at the blood sliding down the girl's through. "You can't just go around grabbing people in the open like that. You know the drill. Snatch, Eat, Erase."

Elena smiled. She had rattled Damon. He hadn't expected her to grab the girl. He was still holding to the Elena he knew _before_. The compassionate one. The one who had reasons to hold on. He didn't know this new Elena yet. While Damon was compelling the girl to forget, Elena had walked up behind her.

Without saying anything she slowly lowered her mouth. She felt her fangs get longer and for the first time she enjoyed the pleasure-pain of them growing. The ache inside her grew as she finally acknowledged how hungry she was. Not just for the girl pinned between her and Damon, but for Damon himself. She held his gaze as her fangs finally sank into the girl's throat and the first burst of blood hit her tongue.

Damon's hands finally grabbed Elena and pulled them both closer. The girl was now being supported only by their bodies. Damon's eyes suddenly changed, the whites turning the red, the blue veins turning black. He couldn't resist either of them anymore. Not with the way Elena was looking at him. His hands on her body would have hurt human Elena, but she was stronger now. She held on just as tight but nothing could prepare her for the moment that Damon bit into the girl's neck.

When it was just her drinking, all she could focus on was the blood. The way that it slid down her throat like warm chocolate, the warmth that suddenly spread through her like fire. It was like she was freezing and submerged herself in a hot bath, except it wasn't painful. It was the most intense feeling, until Damon joined in.

With Damon, she felt everything the same, only now it was combined with a lust so powerful she wanted to rip the girl to shreds just to get to Damon. Her attention was split between the intense fire of feeding, and the need that was burning in her core. She drank deeper, pulling harder and she could feel Damon's hands grab her so hard it hurt, but she didn't care. She wanted more. She wanted to feel everything. Her hands worked their way from his arms until they grabbed his hair and pulled. He would have moaned had it not been for the throat in his way.

The heartbeat between them slowed, finally, and Elena shoved the body aside and was slamming Damon against a wall. She had thought he would be caught off guard, forgetting that his reflexes were as fast as hers, if not faster. His hands grabbed her hips and pulled until their bodies were touching everywhere. Elena heard a crack as his head hit the brick wall behind him, but Damon didn't seem to care.

Still with her hands on his hair, Elena pulled his head to the side and pressed her tongue to his collarbone where a little bit of blood has pooled. Now, Damon did moan, lost completely to the woman in his hands and the throbbing between his legs. Elena's tongue began moving upward, catching all of the blood that had fallen, slowly. Too slowly.

Damon growled in frustration and pushed back, throwing themselves across the ally and against the opposite wall. Elena's shocked gasped disappeared as Damon's mouth slammed into her with as much force. Now she knew he had been holding back all those times. The soft kisses were nice, but even as a human she knew that there was more power than that he could give. And if the hard shaft pressed against her gave anything away, she knew he wouldn't be holding back anymore.

It took all that she had to pull herself back enough to be able to speak, but she wanted to push him, bend all of his limits and get them to break, and giving him what he wanted on the first try wouldn't be enough.

"That wasn't dinner. It was just a snack." She managed to push Damon back enough that she could sprint away and disappear in the crowd.

Damon stood dazed, panting, and harder than the brick wall he was now leaning against. He had a body to clean up and blood was everywhere, and yet…

"God I love New York."


	2. Chapter 2 Humanity

Stefan looked at the charred mess that was the living room and tried his best to ignore the smell. The living room was damaged, but still there. He couldn't say the same for Jeremy's body. Now he and Caroline just needed to figure out what to do with it.

Caroline came around the corner holding a trash can. "I double checked the house and nothing else seems to be damaged or on fire. I think it's safe to say that we got it all." She glanced down at Jeremy's body and sighed. She looked like she was fighting to stand up, though she never cried. "Oh Jeremy." Then she turned to Stefan "What are we going to do with his body?"

Stefan looked up from the black carpet. "I was going to ask you the same thing. I wish Elena was here."

The house was barely being held together. The fireplace was gone and the wall had been almost completely burned down. Now, a giant hole showed the side yard. The floors were torched, as was all the furniture in the kitchen and living and dining rooms. Elena's journals and Jeremy's sketches were just ashes. The ceiling wasn't falling in, but all of the dry wall would need to be replaced and the entire second floor smelled like smoke. He didn't know where to begin when it came to fixing the place.

Stefan's thoughts drifted toward Elena. The sound of her gasping, desperate sobs was going to fuel his nightmares for months. In all his time in this world, he had never heard anything like that. He didn't know a person could break like that. Through it all, he couldn't help thinking it should be him with Elena, helping her through her grief, not Damon. But in her moment of need, the sire bond forced her to turn to his brother, not him.

Curses he wouldn't let out rattled in his brain. All of this was because of that damn sire bond. Elena left him. The house was burned. Even Jeremy's death, all of it could be traced back to it. Stefan wanted _his_ Elena back. The one who fell in love with him so easily. The one who loved him so deeply that even knowing his darkest secrets hadn't scared her away.

He needed to find the cure. But first, he needed a backup plan in case he couldn't find it. Or in case he didn't get to it first. And right now, the best plan B was getting Elena to turn her humanity back on. Stefan looked once again at Jeremy's body and knew what to do.

"He should be buried with his family. Elena, whenever she comes back, she'll want to be able to visit his grave. He belongs with them."

Caroline seemed spurred into actions at his words, unwilling to sit around and wait. "Okay, you're right. Absolutely. We'll…we'll bury Jeremy with his family, and then we'll fix the house up to look good as new. I've practically lived in this house since I was five. I can make it perfect." Caroline began cleaning and moving things around, happy to have a purpose. "After that, we just need to get Elena and Damon to come back to Mystic Fall's and when she sees the house BAM! humanity switch back on."

It was the best plan they had. Stefan just hoped it would work.

* * *

Once Elena was a few blocks away from Damon, she began to look for other things to occupy her time. She figured that Damon wasn't one for exploration, especially since he had been to the city before. He probably wouldn't want to waste time showing her anything either. But the more time she spent in the city, the more she just didn't care anymore for exploring. What was the point? Going to all of those touristy locations would be crowded and there was no way she would be able to eat anyone.

New York was already starting to bore her when she stopped in front of a salon. Maybe New York was boring because she hadn't yet let go of everyone in her new life. Darling Elena still hadn't fully accepted this new life and all of its possibilities. What she needed was change. A physical one to separate New Elena from Old Elena.

"Good morning! What time is your appointment?" The brunette behind the desk was surprisingly perky. Weren't New Yorkers supposed to be rude?

Elena leaned close, trying to look at the schedule book, but the woman covered it up. _Okay, have it your way_. Elena focused her energy on compelling the woman and felt her pupils constrict, then dilate. "Answer me: Who has the next appointment?"

The woman glanced down at her book and said in her same chipper voice. "Theresa Sagely."

"And what is she having done?"

"A blow-out and color."

Color, huh? Elena thought that sounded like the perfect change to usher in this new era of Elena-ness. "Go tell the stylist that Theresa is here." Man, she could really get used to this compulsion thing.

A few minutes later, Elena was sitting in the stylist's chair debating what she wanted to have done. Should she chop it all off and dye is purple? _I wonder if people still get perms._ But that would be too close to Katherine. Black would be too much, and she was very attached to the warm brown color.

Suddenly, her thoughts went to Damon in the ally and the girl between them as her blood flowed freely. She remembered the fire.

"Make it red."

* * *

A couple of hours later Damon finally spotted Elena in the crowd, making her way to him. The first thing he noticed was the red in her hair. The second thing was the red on her lips. And last, but absolutely not least, was the clothes. The woman was wearing all black with the perfect pair of skin-tight, leather—leggings?—whatever those thin, not-pants were that everyone was wearing these days.

Damon pulled his bottom lip between his teeth as he thought about how slowly those would peel off her thighs, exposing her soft skin. _Focus, you moron._ He needed to stop thinking about her body, and start thinking about how he was going to keep her out of trouble. He wanted her to enjoy herself, sure, but he also didn't want to listen to a lecture from Stefan when they got home about tight leashes and how he should have gone with her instead of Damon.

"You didn't have dinner without me did you?" Elena looked confused so Damon reached out to slide his thumb along her bottom lip to clean up the blood. It was a gesture that was meant to be sexy, but subtle. Elena clearly didn't think so. When Damon tried to pull his hand back to wipe off the blood, she grabbed his hand. Just like earlier in the alley, her eyes never left his as her lips wrapped around his thumb to suck it clean.

Damon stood transfixed. Elena was going to kill him; he was sure of it. New York would be his death.

Satisfied that his thumb was adequately cleaned, and his other parts were adequately throbbing, she answered. "It wasn't dinner."

Desperate to bring the conversation to any other topic, Damon said, "Well, somebody got a hot new haircut."

Elena smiled and twirled her hair. "It was time for a change."

"So, there are a couple of places that I wanted to show you before we go to dinner. And there are a couple of ground rules we need to go over."

Elena rolled her eyes. She knew what this was, but she still found it annoying. It was only a matter of time before Damon tried to invoke the sire bond to keep her in check. He and Stefan must still believe that the sire bond was tied to Damon's blood instead of her feelings before the change. Now that those feelings were gone, no more sire bond. But she wasn't ready for him to know that yet. She decided to play along.

"Ground rules? Boring." Elena pouted for extra effect.

Damon rested his hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eye. "While we're here, you can't kill anybody. You can play snatch, eat, erase on whoever you want, but you can't kill anybody. If you kill anybody, we can't stay here and that would make me really unhappy." He paused, trying to gauge her reflection to see if it was working, but he honestly couldn't tell. He didn't exactly know how a sire bond worked.

Elena sighed, obviously disappointed, but she seemed otherwise fine. "Okay. You're right, and I don't want to leave either. What did you want to show me?"

Damon took Elena on a small tour of a couple of blocks that surrounded the hotel where they would be staying. The hotel was all that compulsion could offer. The master suite rivaled any bathroom Elena had come across, and she couldn't wait to try it out later. Damon also made sure to point out any nooks and crannies where Elena could easily take someone to feed without being spotted. Elena also made a note of available shopping.

The entire time Damon tried to keep his distance from her. While he knew he wouldn't exactly be taking advantage of Elena, he couldn't help but thinking about how things were left before she turned off her humanity switch. He felt like he was betraying Old Elena somehow. He needed to be the sane, rational, non-impulsive brother right now and that was hard enough when Elena wasn't trying to suck out his soul through his thumb. Though, that didn't stop him from checking out her ass every chance he got.

When they got to Billy's bar, Damon figured now was as good a chance as any to set her free and test out that sire bond. He needed some privacy anyway in order to go through all of Will's files to find Katherine.

"Okay, look, I want to pop in and say hello to my good old friend Will, and you need to go get ready for dinner. So why don't we go our separate ways and meet up with each other at the hotel in a couple hours?"

Elena made sure to keep her face blank, but something was off. She wondered why he was suddenly itching to get away from her. "And what should I plan to wear for dinner?"

Damon's smirk made promises she hoped he would keep. "Think Murder House."

* * *

Elena waited a couple of blocks away while she listening to Damon rummaging around in some boxes. _What was he doing in there?_ She wanted to know whatever it was that Damon was doing, but she was worried that because of his age he would hear her coming. Whatever, it was a risk she needed to take. The worst that would happen would be he would lie to her, but she was sure the information wasn't necessary to her plan.

When she got to the foot of the stairs leading to the part where Will lived, she heard Damon answer his phone. Good, she thought, maybe he would be distracted enough that he wouldn't know she was listening.

She heard Damon's voice first. "So Silas is appearing as Professor Shane? Wouldn't be my first choice." Always the vain one.

"Well, it would be if you needed to brainwash Bonnie into committing a massacre." Stefan said.

Damon paused what he was doing. "You need me to come home?" It would be awful timing. And he knew that Elena wouldn't exactly be jumping at the chance to return to Mystic Fall's, but maybe he was wrong to take her away from her friends.

Stefan sighed. He wanted to say yes, but with everything going on, he couldn't handle Elena too. Besides, the house wasn't ready yet. "No, we got it. How's the cure search going?"

Elena suddenly stood up from the banister she was leaning on. She felt something stir inside her, but couldn't identify what it was. Instead she pushed it away and focused her hearing even more. The cure. Damon was here searching for the cure. That's why he brought her here. That's why he was going down memory lane. She didn't think he was lying about wanting to show her a good time, but in true Damon fashion he decided to omit the important parts.

Whatever was said next Elena didn't hear it. Instead she was focusing on her timeline. She had wanted to break Damon slowly. Wear away at his carefully constructed walls until she barely had to ask him to turn off his humanity switch.

But now she didn't have time. Elena was going to get Damon to turn off his humanity. Tonight.

* * *

A/N: Thank you all so much for reading! Please share and review if you like it. I promise, the next chapter will live up to the story's rating.


	3. Chapter 3 Guilt

You would think that after 150 years Damon would be used to feeling guilty, but here he was at his dead friends bar emptying a regrettably cheap bottle of bourbon. He felt guilty about letting Elena out of his sight when he should be watching her. Though, the sire bond should keep her from killing anyone. He felt guilty for going behind her back and trying to find the cure. He reasoned that was what was best for her. Oh, and don't forget the constant guilt of falling for his brother's girl.

And all of that wasn't even touching on the newfound guilt every time Elena plastered her body against him. That one was the most fun. Guilt for trying to turn her down and guilt for not wanting to.

He drained the last bit of bourbon as though it would wash the emotion away. He thought of Elena again and that new glint in her eye when she tried to make him cross a line and felt his dick twitch.

Whelp. Maybe the next bottle of bourbon would do the trick.

When he got like this, Damon liked to find people he could blame for whatever situation he was currently in. Usually blaming Katherine made him feel better, but that hadn't been working since he met Elena. If Katherine hadn't given him her blood he never would have met Elena. He supposed blaming Stefan would work. Not for forcing him to turn because, again, meeting Elena.

But he could blame Stefan for nodding to him that it was okay for him to take Elena to New York instead being his usual self and trying to talk her out of it. He could blame Stefan for not volunteering himself to go. He could blame all of the people responsible for Jeremy's death, the stupid nurse for even using his blood to heal Elena in the first place. Hell, he could blame the universe for just all-in-all being a dick.

Ah, who was he kidding. His favorite person to blame was himself, and halfway through his second bottle of bourbon he was just starting to get good and buzzed when he realized what time it was.

Damon took a breath that he imagined solidifying his will power against Elena's new determination to make him pop like warm champagne, but he knew he was at his end when it came to resisting what he'd wanted so long.

Besides, what was a little more guilt?

Damon pour a drink on the bar for Will and made his way toward Elena.

* * *

Elena took her time getting ready. Looking at the clock, she guessed she still had about an hour before Damon would show up. The bath had been as heavenly as she imagined and now her skin was soft and lightly scented with the vanilla and lavender bubble bath she had used.

While she got ready she thought about what she wanted to happen. Honestly, Elena had no idea what Damon would be like without his humanity, but she didn't care. As long as he was still working with Stefan to get the cure, he was never going to stop. And she would constantly be alone while trying to fend everybody off who thought they knew better than her. The best way for her to keep her humanity off was going to be to have someone on her side. Even though there was no guarantee that Damon would still be interested in her afterwards, she had to try.

But how?

Elena began pulling her hair up to make sure her neck was completely exposed, and tried to think about it logically. Damon is someone who is impulsive, yes, but he's also much more in control of his vampire urges than just about anyone, except maybe Caroline. That's why she wanted to get him bloated on blood and so worked up he couldn't think straight. If she could get him there, maybe he wouldn't think about what she was asking and just do it.

Meanwhile, she was going to have to think of a plan B in case she couldn't get Damon distracted enough.

Elena slid the dress over her head, careful not to catch her hair or get makeup on the white fabric. She supposed that black would be more Damon's style, but she liked the image of a white dress covered in blood. The contrast with her black, patent leather heals would be amazing. She took stock of herself in the full length mirror.

When they had gone to the Murder House frat party, everyone was dressed as some sort of serial killer or victim. She doubted that would be true of wherever Damon was taking her. Instead she chose to dress in a way that would make Damon want to kill anyone who tried to touch her.

The dress fell to just above her knee, but on the left slide there was a wide slit up to the top of her thigh. The back was open, letting everyone know she wasn't wearing a bra. The front plunged just enough to show the swell of her breasts. It was going to be perfect.

Just then she heard the front door open, followed by Damon's voice. "Elena?" He called.

"I'll be right there!" She yelled back. She took a deep breath, confident in her plan, and walked to the front to face Damon.

He was dressed the same as he always was in all black with his staple leather jacket and motorcycle boots. Her eyes followed the lines of his v-neck shirt becoming distracted at the sight of his collar bone. She wanted to scrape her teeth along it and feel Damon's moans in his chest.

Damon fought and lost the quickest internal struggle while he watched Elena's fangs drop down. He could smell how badly she wanted him from across the room and he was dying to know if she was as wet as he thought she was. Dinner would have to wait.

Elena seemed to read his mind as he began to move toward her and they clashed in the middle of the room. She wasted no time going for his jacket and pushing it off his shoulders and down his arms. The height difference threw Damon at first, as he wasn't used to looking up to her, but her teeth on his bottom lip made him decide he didn't care. The heels wouldn't matter once he had her against the wall. Or on the floor.

He didn't think they were going to make it to the bedroom.

Elena's hands pulled his hair hard enough to scatter his thoughts and he realized she was trying to fight him for control. _Little minx._ Never one to back down, he decided his first battle was going to be fixing the height differences. Control would be easier when she was literally beneath him.

Her hands stayed tangled in his hair while she began to nibble and kiss her way down to his throat. When Damon felt her fangs trace the edge of his vein, he thought he might actually come on the spot. While she focused on his neck, his hands made their way down her body, appreciating every turn and bump of her skin until they finally rested on her hips. Suddenly, he squeezed her tight and pulled her flush against him, making sure that she felt his dick pressed against her stomach. Elena let out a moan against his throat and the smell of her arousal got even stronger in the room.

Damon needed to act quickly while she was distracted. Using his vamp speed, he pushed Elena against the wall behind them and used his thigh between her legs to keep her pinned. His hands were making their way under the skirt of her dress when he felt Elena grind against his leg. His eyes closed and his hands gripped her thighs in a vice while he tried to remember all the reasons why he shouldn't be coming right now. But that was hard to do when she kept moaning.

Finally, he felt the edge of her panties and slowly pulled them upwards, causing them to rub even more against her sensitive flesh. Her moan turned into a sharp gasp and ended in his name. God he loved the way she said his name. Elena ground against his thigh, pulling her panties even tighter and he felt her shudder throughout her entire body.

Now was his chance. Before she would react he had both of her legs wrapped around his waist, effectively eliminating any difference in height and allowing him to grind against her soaking core. He groaned when he felt how hot she was. That was one battle won. But he wanted to win the whole war.

By the time Elena realized what Damon had done, she knew she was in danger of losing. His hips surged forward and she felt him from her entrance to her swollen clit. Her gums ached and she wanted to _bite_ something. Vaguely, she heard a strange sound and realized that she was grinding her teeth together so hard she was surprised Damon hadn't heard. Although, he was a bit preoccupied. God, she wanted…she wanted…

She whimpered. She couldn't help it, but the need to be filled in more ways than one was overwhelming any scheming she had. Desperate, she finally told Damon, "I want more."

It was the closest she had ever come to begging for something. She was used to being given whatever she wanted, but this game that they were playing was keeping him from giving in. His voice purred in her ear, accentuated by another thrust against her scorching clit. "What do you want, kitten?"

She felt the heat in her eyes and didn't think she could answer. All of her focus on was on the blood she could see and hear moving through his veins. She was too sensitive. Her clit. Her fangs. She had never wanted anything as much as she wanted to come right now. Another sharp movement had her crying out and she thought, screw talking.

Taking his question as an invitation, she finally sank her teeth into his neck. The moment his blood gushed into her mouth, she was done for. The combination of his leg between her legs, her teeth _finally_ biting into his flesh, and the taste of his blood had her coming. His blood muffled her screams, but she knew he could feel her body convulsing. Every jerk forcing her to swallow even more blood. Her hold on him tightened and right before she finished, she heard Damon cuss while his own orgasm forced him to hold on to her even tighter.

Elena carefully pulled her fangs out of Damon's neck, aware that she had probably bit too hard, and her gums were sensitive anyway. They were both panting, and Damon was still pressed firmly against her, a fine sheen of sweat visible on his chest and neck.

If Damon felt at all what she was feeling, she knew it wasn't enough for him either. And now that she'd taken some of his blood he was going to be even hungrier. Good. Slowly, he stepped away from her, making sure that her feet were planted squarely on the floor.

"Well, at least now I have something to really be guilty about." Elena raised her eyebrow at him, but didn't say anything. She was too focused on making sure her knees didn't give out. "I need to change, and then we can leave."

When he came back ten minutes later, he looked like he wanted to talk to her, but she held up a finger to his lips. "No," she said. "Not tonight. The whole purpose of coming here was to have fun, remember?"

He nodded, giving in easily. Perhaps he didn't feel like lying to her anymore than he already had. Or maybe he thought that now she would be satisfied and not push him for more tonight.

"Then let's go have fun. We can talk in the morning." Elena had no plans to talk to him, but it got him out of the hotel, and on their way to the party.

* * *

A/N I hope you enjoyed! I'm sorry this one is shorter than usual and took longer. Writer's block and crazy life made it difficult. Also, I was hoping to not have to make these next two chapters separate, but there was no way to make it work without it being crazy long. The next chapter is almost done and hopefully it will be done tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 4

When Elena first saw the place where Damon was taking her, she wanted to say she changed her mind, and Billy's was just fine for her. The factory looked like it hadn't been occupied with anything except rats in at least a decade. She couldn't stop the look of disgust on her face.

"Easy, judge-y." Damon said. "At least wait until we get inside before deciding it's not worth your time."

Elena pouted. "Fine. But I was promised hedonism."

When they reached the door, Damon compelled the doorman that they had already paid and to let them in. Now that they were closer, Elena could hear the bass through the walls.

"Now, I know that underground punk music isn't exactly your cup of tea. So I thought we would try this instead." Damon placed his hand on Elena's back and gently pushed her through the door. At first, Elena's jaw dropped, and then turned into an ecstatic smile.

Damon had brought her to a rave filled without so many people they could feed all night and still not have tasted everyone.

Black lights were hung in just about every imaginable place. In combination with the strobe and laser lights, it was enough that you could see where you going. Not to mention everyone was wearing something that glowed in the lights. Well, everyone except Damon. Elena threw her arms around him and kissed him with all of her pent up energy and desire. When she pulled back, they were both sporting elongated fangs.

Damon said simply, "Pick."

Elena pulled Damon behind her, pushing her way through the crowd until they were surrounded. At first, she just stood still while she listened to the music, eyes closed like she was concentrating. Once she had the beat down, she pulled Damon closer and began moving her hips against his in time with the music.

For a long time, all they did was dance. It was the first time that they could dance and actually enjoy it. Elena wasn't tied to Stefan. Bonnie wasn't around to get in the middle. They could just enjoy the feeling of each other's bodies and the music uninhibited.

In the hotel room earlier, their passion had been explosive. All of their feelings had been shoved so tightly into a bottle, that at the smallest nudge it had shattered. This time, they had time to learn the ways their bodies fit together. Their blood was simmering just before the surface, waiting for them to act on it. Elena ran her hands up Damon's arms, tracing every line of muscle before locking behind his neck. Likewise, Damon's hands analyzed the curves of her back and hips.

Elena wanted to take her time with Damon. She wanted hours to memorize every sound that he makes depending on if she used her hands or tongue or teeth.

Thank God they have all night.

The two of them separated now that they were finally hungry enough that they could hear the underlying bass of everyone's heartbeats. Elena began dancing with a guy who was wearing a neon-yellow fishnet top and black pants. Objectively, she knew that other women would find him attractive, but he was too bulky. She placed both hands on his face to make him look her in the eyes while she compelled him.

"Don't scream. You're going to enjoy this." She said. Her fangs finally descended into his jugular, and, again, this one of the first times she felt she could really savor being a vampire and feeding. She couldn't help thinking about how it was different from drinking Damon's blood earlier.

Damon's blood was like liquor. It was heady, and made her warm and even a little bit buzzed, but it wasn't something that she needed. Human blood on the other hand, felt like jumping in a pool after being stuck in a desert for days. She could feel its effects throughout her entire body and it felt like _life_. Life that she needed, and he had, and she would do anything to keep living.

Elena thought about stopping. If she killed him right now, Damon would know that the sire bond was gone, but wouldn't he have to find out eventually? He wanted more than anything to know that she wanted him for real. What was more real than turning of your humanity and still wanting to be near another person? It may not be exactly in the way that he wanted, but still. Close enough.

She felt a hand on her shoulder trying to pull her away, but she was so _hungry_. Her fingers closed tighter on his shoulders and pulled him closer, pulling more and more blood out of the vein. The heartbeat was starting to slow down just as Damon finally pried her away.

"Elena. Stop. You're going to kill him." His brow had a little crease and those blue eyes were just plain unfair.

"So?"

With that one word Damon knew. The sire bond had been broken. "How long have you known?

"Since I first turned off my humanity. You would have known that too had you listened to anything I told you before you made me flip the switch." The words came out matter-of-factly.

Damon's eyes narrowed as he put the pieces together. "The sire bond is connected to your feelings for the vampire who sired you. Now you have no feelings." He sounded a combination of awed and fascinated from learning something new about being a vampire. And just a little bit annoyed.

Elena eyeballed the blood that left a trail from his lips and licked her own in response. She wanted more. She cleaned some of it up with her thumb and licked it clean.

"I'm getting bored now." She took another step closer to Damon until he had to look up to her. "No more talking."

She leaned down and licked the remaining blood from his chin before sliding her tongue along his bottom lip. She smiled when she felt Damon's hands grip her waist, but then he pushed her back a step.

"We can't keep doing this Elena."

"Why not? I want you. You want me. I don't see a problem."

"Yes. I want _you._ And right now, you're not you, Elena. Maybe when—" He abruptly cut off when he realized what he was about to say. He opened his mouth to change the subject, but Elena cut him off.

"You mean, maybe when you've given me the cure and I'm human again?" Damon tried again to say something. A lie probably, but Elena felt something stirring inside her, rising quickly to the surface. "You're like a dog with a bone! You and Stefan are never going to give up! Are you?"

Damon finally spoke up. "Yes, Elena. I lied to you. Focus on the rage you're feeling."

Elena thought about rage. Felt it well up inside her until she thought she might explode with how intense the emotion was. Heat rose to her face and Elena didn't even try to fight it. She planned to use it as a weapon. She kept screaming at Damon.

"You're not going to stop until you find the cure and make me take it. God, I am so _sick_ of everyone telling me what I want!" Without thinking she grabbed the nearest body and sank her teeth in without compulsion and with no intent on leaving the heart still beating. Elena tossed it, dead, and felt nothing. All she could focus on was how livid she was and on how she could force Damon's hands.

"Stefan wants to fix me, make me human, get the girl back that he loves with no regard for the person I am. Caroline and Bonnie wanted to break my sire bond because I couldn't possibly have feelings for _Damon Salvatore_." Her head whipped around and she moved close to Damon. So close he could feel her breath on his skin.

"Even you. You tried to tell me what I was feeling was a sire bond. You tried to get away from me. You ignored everything I was telling you, everything I wanted, because you had convinced yourself it was the right thing to do without listening to what I was actually saying." She grabbed another body. "Now you're going to listen to what I want, Damon." She practically spat the word.

"You're going to turn off your humanity switch. Or there isn't going to be a body left in this room with a pulse."

Damon stared. He didn't know what else to do while his brain processed. This…body in front of him looked like Elena, smelled like Elena. But it wasn't the Elena he knew. And yet it was. He knew she was trying to keep her emotions down, but all of that anger was coming from how she felt before she flipped her humanity. Maybe if he could just get her to open up a little.

"Look, Elena, you're right. No one listens to you. Everyone just spats psycho-babble and tries to analyze how you feel without actually listening to you." He put his arms out, trying to seem harmless. "So, how 'bout you just put the body down, and we can talk about it?"

Elena glanced down at the body for the first time, and smelled the fear coming off it in waves. She could also hear a couple of people screaming while they tried to get away. It didn't matter. By the time anyone got here, she planned to be gone. "I'm hearing a lot of talking."

There was no time for Damon to react. He was too far away and no one was that fast. Elena snapped the man's neck and tossed him next to the other one. _Dammit! Why had he brought her to a place with so many damn people?_ Elena already had another body in her arms. He could probably race over there to get her, but with so many people around, he couldn't save them all.

"Turn it off, Damon."

Damon tried to switch lanes. "You wanna kill everyone in the room? Fine! What do I care about some pesky little humans? But killing them isn't going to get you what you want." Maybe he could at least reach the cold, rational part of her brain. He tried to keep his tone a light, singsong. "But you should know that if you kill everyone in the room that this gig is going to close and there won't be an encore."

Elena paused. He was right. She could kill everyone in the room and then some and Damon wouldn't care. He would worry what would happen if her humanity switch every got turned back on, but he wouldn't care for the actual bodies. _What did Damon care about?_ Himself, certainly, but he loved her enough to die if necessary. His brother, but he was too far away and there was no way to leverage him. Finally she had it.

Damon didn't like the look in Elena's eyes. It was too bright, shining through, but not in a sunshine way. More like black oil on a dark road in the moonlight. It was the kind of look that didn't have limits. She threw the body next to the others and Damon heard her scream as she landed next to the other dead ones.

"You're right. I could kill this whole city and it wouldn't be enough to get you to flip your humanity switch. Luckily, I don't need the whole town; I just need the right body."

Elena bolted for the wooden stage where the DJ was set up. Her foot kicked the nearest leg causing it to splinter. Now, she held a sharp, wooden, stake. Without hesitating, she shoved the stake under her sternum until it rubbed against her heart. A scream tried to escape, but Elena held it in, only a gasp gave away that she felt anything.

Damon was there in a second. "What the hell, Elena? Are you stupid?" Damon shoved her hand away and pulled out the stake. Elena took a deep breath.

"Stupid? Actually, I think I'm quite clever. See, you're here today. But will you be every second for the next eternity? How many times can you possibly prevent me from staking myself?"

Damon's fury was tainted with fear. His eyes narrowed. "You wouldn't."

"Stefan would never forgive you. None of them would if I died. And who would believe that poor, innocent Elena Gilbert had staked herself. And you," she gasped in false surprise, "you were supposed to be watching me, protecting me. You would lose the only two people in this world who actually give a crap whether you live or die."

He was getting desperate. She was right. But he couldn't do this. Who would bring her back if not him? Who would bring him back if not her? How long would they stay like this? What would Stefan do?

The answer was easy. Obvious. Stefan would do it to save her. Surely, Stefan would understand and not all would be lost.

"Elena, don't do this. I know you're angry, but we can't come back from this. You don't know what I was like when I had my humanity off." Damon watched the oil in her eyes go flat, cold. She was getting a hold of her emotions, locking everything down. He lost her.

"Not good enough."

 _Forgive me, little brother._ Damon closed his eyes and pictured the switch. He always imagined it as an actual light switch. ON/OFF.

Damon turned it off.


End file.
